olgakuzmina

We went to the latest One Night Stan show on Friday and, even though there was some insanity (such as my car window getting stuck down, the band's order being changed at the last minute, blah, blah, blah,) it was a good time. Check it out, in pics and videos:Are you ready to ROCK?And these are the "shitty" (even if the quality isn't too bad) videos that we took with Sherri's camera... once I figure out how to upload from my new video camera, I'll post those, too. Gote is a jerk and I want to see if he's reading this.

It's been a weird week. Here's part of what helps me get through it all:Awwww, isn't Abigail adorable! I took this pic the night Sherri got back from Detroit. Jamesy looked pretty awesome in this picture. I don't have new pictures of all my friends, but they're all beautiful and I don't know what I would do without any one of them. Thanks, guys!

You might be wondering whether or not the morning yesterday was a fluke (as hoped) or if it was just all unlucky and horrible. Well, it wasn't so bad.I had lunch with Waynie and then went with him to the video game store Brittany's boyfriend, Eddie, works at. There I got three movies (The Fifth Element, Kung Fu Hustle, and Where the Heart Is,) and the first season of The Simpsons for just $25. Not bad at all. Shopping always cheers me up, haha. While I was at lunch, though, one of my afternoon patients canceled on me, too. That definitely sucked, but it happens. So, I was seeing my last patient of the day and getting ready to leave the Outreach (or free) clinic when a ton of new patients came in, and Dr. Bobo grabbed me to take care of one. So I got a new patient yesterday after all! Of course, the adjustments in the free clinic don't count the same as the adjustments in the paying clinic, (incidentally, we must have 50% paying adjustments than free ones... wonder why....) but I can still get X-ray credits, new patient credits, and complicated cases from the free clinic, so lucky day for me. Plus, I got scheduled for a new lottery patient in the paying clinic for this morning. Hooray! He's supposed to come in at 10, so I have a little bit to prepare. Not that you can prepare much, but yeah. Also, I scheduled a new patient who is one of Ashley and James's co-workers for tomorrow. So, things are hopefully working out. I overslept this morning. My alarm didn't go off for whatever reason and I ended up sleeping in until 7:30. I woke up and considered my situation. I was tired, I didn't have a patient until 10, and so I decided to just go back to sleep for a while. But I couldn't. So, I got up, took my shower, and was sort of chilling for a bit at home when Ashley called and told me to schedule her co-worker. It was very lucky that I was already up, because I was able to come in here to clinic sooner and thus ensure my ability to schedule him as soon as tomorrow. That was handy. So, yay.

Well, after posting that weepy entry, I find this fantastic news to cheer me up: Attorney General Gonzales resignsHooray!!!! It might be too much to hope, but maybe now we can have an Attorney General who isn't a lying sack of shit! ^_^Edit: of course, for every bit of good news, there is something that puts it into grim perspective:""We can't get anything now no bread, no petrol ... nothing," says Shephard Lunga, a truck driver from Bulawayo, Zimbabwe's second largest city. "If you don't have somebody who's outside the country supplying you with things, you're finished."The country's beleaguered economy has taken a turn for the worse since late June, when President Robert Mugabe ordered all prices cut by at least 50 percent in a bid to slow runaway inflation. The move backfired, causing manufacturers to stop producing their goods. Now grocery store shelves are barren, and people are increasingly hungry."-From this article Entitled "Zimbabwe Economy In Free Fall." So, in this country we get liars and thieves... but at least our leaders don't starve us!

Today is not my best day ever. I get up early as I supposed to have a brand new patient at 8 AM this morning. I'm not exactly happy to have to get up super early on a Monday to see this patient, but I'm thrilled to have a new patient at all, so I certainly wasn't complaining. Until the patient failed to show. Dammit. This is the THIRD new patient I've had cancel on me in a row that I didn't even get to meet. On the one hand, I know it's not anything personal, but on the other hand what the mother fuck? Seriously. I never had this happen to me with this startling degree of frequency before, and all of a sudden it's like I can get a new patient in when I need them the absolute most. This is so unbelievably frustrating it's beyond all description. And to top it all off? My phone did itself a master reset, meaning that I lost all personal data on it. All phone numbers and other contact information, all personal settings, all my appointments in my planner, everything. But most disappointingly... all my pictures. Included in these were the last pictures of Alpha that were ever taken. Sure, they were mostly backed up already, but I can't exactly take new ones of Alphie to carry around with me. And I can't exactly get new pics on here of everyone I love as many of them are thousands of miles away. It just sucks. Luckily, I had recently transcribed all my contact info off my phone, so I lost a minimum of data in that regard at least. I had this nagging feeling I needed to (especially after having so many friends loose their numbers in various ways) like two weeks ago, so I took a morning and devoted it to writing all my info down. I have a few new numbers since then that got lost, but since I have the majority of my information intact, it shouldn't be hard to get that back, thank goodness. Anyway, I hope that this terrible start to the week is a fluke rather than the rule.

My mom sent me an email with the following answers from my dad and her (respectively.) I thought they were too cute not to share:Dad's answers:)Q. Can you cook?1.)A. yes2.)Q. What was your dream growing up?2.)A. to move to WV3.)Q. What talent do you wish you had?3.)A. dance4.)Q. If I bought you a drink what would it be?4.)A. Argentinian coffee5.)Q. Favorite vegetable?5.)A. corn on the cob6.)Q. What was the last book you read?6.)A. A Feisty Little Dog7.)Q. What zodiac sign are you ?7.)A Aquarius8.)Q. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?8.)A. no9.)Q. Worst Habit?9.)A. procrastination10.)Q. If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?10.)A. of course11.)Q. What is your favorite sport?11.)A. basketball12.)Q. Negative or Optimistic attitude?12.)A. optimistic13. )Q. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?13.)A. talk about when you were a baby14.)Q. Worst thing to ever happen to you?14.)A. Dad passing away15.)Q. Tell me one weird fact about you:15.)A. I would rather hunt than eat.16.)Q. Do you have any pets?16.)A. yes, yes, yes17.)Q. What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly?17.)A. "Boy, am I glad to see you!"18.)Q. What was your first impression of me?18.)A. cutest thing I ever saw19.)Q. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?19.)A. not scary, so cute20.)Q. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be???20.)A. more muscles21.)Q. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?21.)A. crime partner22.)Q. What color eyes do you have?22.)A. blue23.)Q. Ever been arrested?23.)A. no24.)Q. Bottle or Draft?24.)A. bottle25.)Q. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?25.)A. go back to Argentina26.)Q. Would you date me?26.)A. no, you're my daughter27.)Q. What 's your favorite place to hang at?27. A. the dock28.)Q. Do you believe in ghosts?28.)A. no29.)Q. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?29.)A. walk a dog30.)Q. Do you swear a lot?30.)A. not a lot31.)Q. Biggest pet peeve?31.)A. people who think they have it rough32.)Q. In one word, how would you describe yourself?32.)A. tough33.)Q. Do you believe/appreciate romance?33.)A. oh, you bet you!34.)Q. If you could spend 12 hours with me and ask/do anything you like, what would it be?34.)A. fish35)Q. Do you believe in God?35)A. yes)Q. Can you cook?1.)A.Oh, yeah!!! My corn pudding is famous!2.)Q. What was your dream growing up?2.)A. to be a teacher3.)Q. What talent do you wish you had?3.)A.singing ..4.)Q. If I bought you a drink what would it be?4.)A.Margarita5.)Q. Favorite vegetable?5.)A. something green6.)Q. What was the last book you read?6.)A. The Tent by Margaret Atwood--it is hysterical; you should read it7.)Q. What zodiac sign are you ?7.)A. Gemini8.)Q. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?8.)A. let the ears grow over twice9.)Q. Worst Habit?9.)A. talk too much10.)Q. If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?10.)A. of course, I love you11.)Q. What is your favorite sport?11.)A. I like to watch B-UMS volleyball. I like to walk.12.)Q. Negative or Optimistic attitude?12.)A. It's the first week of school--negative. Check back later.13. )Q. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?13.)A. Discuss the world.14.)Q. Worst thing to ever happen to you?14.)A. Death of my dad and in-laws15.)Q. Tell me one weird fact about you:15.)A. I want Grateful Dead played at my funeral.16.)Q. Do you have any pets?16.)A.DO I EVER!!!!17.)Q. What if i showed up at your house unexpectedly?17.)A. I'd be sure something was wrong.18.)Q. What was your first impression of me?18.)A. You hurt a lot coming out.19.)Q. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?19.)A. Cute, sometimes TOO cute20.)Q. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be???20.)A. my ears or maybe liposuction to the abdomen21.)Q. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?21.)A. I'm your MOTHER--of course I have to be your conscience22.)Q. What color eyes do you have?22.)A. brown, like yours23.)Q. Ever been arrested?23.)A.no, but I rode home in a cop car for breaking curfew once24.)Q. Bottle or Draft?24.)A. neither25.)Q. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?25.)A. go back to Argentina26.)Q. Would you date me?26.)A. I'm your MOTHER!!! THAT would be very sick.27.)Q. What 's your favorite place to hang at?27. A. Abbott28.)Q. Do you believe in ghosts?28.)A. yes, reluctantly29.)Q. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?29.)A. read, do Sudoku30.)Q. Do you swear a lot?30.)A. sometimes31.)Q. Biggest pet peeve?31.)A. lousy parenting32.)Q. In one word, how would you describe yourself?32.)A. happy33.)Q. Do you believe/appreciate romance?33.)A. of course, I live with your dad34.)Q. If you could spend 12 hours with me and ask/do anything you like, what would it be?34.)A. no interruptions--just us35)Q. Do you believe in God?35)A.oh, yes; don't see how others can live without faith36.)Q. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same36.)A I don't know what that means but I'll try.

Lisa and Chippy left early this morning for Philly and will be gone for two weeks. It'll be weird without them around, but I'm sure Lis will have a good time. ^_^ So it's just Jackie and me for a little while, but I'm willing to bet that there will be plenty of guest appearances. In fact, I'm planning on having a small get-together Friday night... so if you'd like to come, email me or whatever for the particulars. Ashley and James have off on Saturday, so we can stay up late, sleep in, and go to the flea market for excellent products with incredible prices! Hooray for everything. Last night we went and hung out at Q's House. He as rebroadcasting an old show as this is his summer hiatus, so it was more of just chilling than anything in particular. I must say Q and Jess are wonderful hosts... I got offered and gladly excepted kool-aid, cookies, chicken on a stick, and the chance to smoke a hooka with Jess. She had tasty flavored tobacco, so I decided to indulge. ^_^ Susie's out in the house looking for Lisa, I think. She's just meowing and meowing and wandering around. I think she'll miss Lisa the most... they were always pretty well bonded. Muggy was being a total love bug this morning when I came home after my appointment to pick up my laptop and take it to the techies to be fixed. Which reminds me, I need to go pick up my lappy! It should be done by now. I also got the crack in my car's windshield fixed today. I guess it's be a productive one. ^_^

I never got around to uploading these from my phone... here you go.Jenny and Sherri love spoiling my doggie!This was taken at the music store Gote likes. Hanging out in Shaun's garage.This was at some anime convention in Orlando that we went to do promotion.

I never did write in here about my trip down to Boyton Beach/Delray last weekend (so James could attend his gf's graduation party-Congrats, Nikki,) but here I am in South Florida again for the second weekend in a row. This trip, however, was for a much less fun reason-my mother's brother is in the hospital as I type, recovering from open-heart surgery. It's understandable that my grandma would want to come see her son (as did I,) so we drove down today to see him. He seems to be doing well, thank goodness. I'm sure that any prayers you guys might spare would be still wanted and welcomed, though. ^_^Gah, I am tired. I have been quite busy lately... which has contributed to my lack of updates, but that is not the sole reason. My laptop is still out of commission, which definately cuts down on my internet time. Between that and just feeling worn out by the time I get a little alone computer time (like now, for instance,) I just don't feel like trying to think of anything significant to say. For example, note the boringness and simplicity of this entry. Then weep. Weep hard. Can I just say that I'm glad that my laptop is not my uncle's laptop (which I am using now?) The shift key on this bitch is tiny, and my long ass pinky nail does not agree with it. At all. Appreciate my proper capitalization with great vigor, for this is more difficult for me than you may think.Again, notice the lack of anything interesting to say.I had a wonderful and long discussion about everything and everyone in my life with my cousin Jenny tonight after we got back from the hospital. It's fantastic to get someone else's perspective. She did help me realize a rather key piece to one of the puzzles that I am currently dealing with-or rather, she helped see how to define something that I was having trouble defining. I like to know who the people in my life are and where they are coming from, and I have a certain person in my circle of friends that I was having trouble understanding. She said one word and suddenly, I gained a new grasp on this person and the way they deal with the world. Amazing that something I was trying to get for months now was so easily seen by her, but she's a) not as involved in the situation as I and b) has had the benefit of dealing with someone with a similar personality before, so she was better able to recognize it for what it was. It's quite nice for my piece of mind, and I'm very glad to be able to have her for a sounding board. I would like to think that I am able to do this for my friends, too. ^_^Well, it's not only late but effin late and I have an early date with the hospital tomorrow. Not only that, but I have drive home and work on school work once I get there. It shall not be a relaxing weekend, but it's worth it to see my uncle with my own eyes and know how he's doing. ^_~

LingerA long timeI'll hold your breath and dreamsExhaleAnd hold itNothing's what it seemsWhen the wandering heart remainsNever to leave againOpen yourself to meFully let me in.The feathers of heaven and then the fires of hellThis is what I find.Saying the thing I meant to sayUntwist the tongue and mind.SlippingLike waterMy fingers are dry and bare.Empty Yet full nowEscape from my lungs, O air!A barren plain embraces its vast expanse.Wind upon your faceWhile another hearth is warm once morePut me in my place.A child lost in the sandstormNo one knows he's there.But even if it were a cloudless dayWould the people even care?Ignore meI'm screamingBut no voice will come.SilenceWho made it?A coldness in the sun.When no one's right and we're all wrong.The eyes are dead and cool.The shepard has lost a lamb tonightAnd I feel like a fool.The road has two ways, equally difficult.Sadly, I'm not numb.The value of the jewels bought tonightIs far less than their sum.

And lie down in a creamy bed in a romantic position..........Last night was fucked up. Suffice to say that I ended up dragging my ass to clinic at eight this morning after only two and a half hours sleep. And no, it wasn't for fun reasons either. I had no less than three if not emergencies, then quite pressing problems occur simultaneously. It all started yesterday afternoon when Ashley called to see if James and I wanted to go with Gote and her to Q's House for the radio show. This was while James was still in work. In short order it was decided for him that we would go. ^_^;;;Then the rest of the evening proper was mostly pretty normal, though very cool. Q and his ladyfriend, Jess, (I'm not sure as to the exact nature of their relationship, as it was not explained to me) were very kind hosts and we had a lot of fun hanging out while the show was recorded. Then after that we went back to Gote's, where I had left my car, and went our separate ways. Ashley was quite anxious to get her inhaler, which she had left at her house in New Smyrna, and James and I both had to be up for eight the next day, so we went straight back to my house. Now, it is important to note that while the show was being recorded, I turned my phone on "silent." That comes in to play later.So, James and I arrive back at my house at around midnight and endeavor to have some of our delightful banana cream cheesecake. We let the dogs out to run around as we secured our desired confections. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see Erik, the great dane I'm dogsitting, sink to the floor, unable to get back up. He's scared and panicky, and I immediately move to calm him. I try to help him stand up, but he cannot. Slowly, a puddle of strong-smelling urine starts to seep out from underneath him. I become very worried then, wondering what could cause him to loose the ability to walk and control of his bladder so completely and all at once. He starts crying and I stop thinking about the whys, only how I can clean him up and get him some place comfortable. With much effort, James and I manage to dry him up some and move him toward my room. He fell down again right in front of the door to my room, which is right next to the front door. I get a towel and properly clean him off before I let him lie on my bed. Right as James and I start to help him to his feet again, there is a knock at the door. It was Sherri. As soon as we let her in, she tells me that Ashley and Gote are stranded on the highway. Gote's car has died, and they need someone to help them. All three of them, Ashley, Gote, and Sherri, had been calling me for quite some time but to no avail. I remember then that I had not taken my phone off silent. So, once Erik was securely placed on my bed and seemed content there, I sent James to bed and took Sherri with me on a rescue mission to New Smyrna. The first place we must go is to get Ashley's inhaler, which is still at her house after all. As I pulled up in front of Ashley's house, I say to Sherri, "I'm going to someone's house in the middle of the night to get drugs," and laugh. It didn't take long to find Gote and Ashley stranded by the side of the road after that. They had secured a ride back to Gote's house with the wrecker, so after the tow truck arrives, Sherri and I leave them to it. From that point onward I finally get to talk to Sherri, who was having a shitty night for more reasons than one. I realize that she needs a friend to talk to (as to I, to a lesser extent,) and so we ended up sitting in my car in the driveway until after three in the morning hashing it all out. After she left, I went back inside only to discover that I wasn't tired at all. The excitement of the last three hours didn't exactly lend itself well to restfulness. So, it was after four-thirty before I finally fell asleep. Two and a half hours later, I was up, getting ready, waking James, and at long last eating some of that damn cheesecake that started it all. I went in and saw my patient and then decided to come home, if for no other reason than to check on Erik. Shortly after getting home, I got a call from my friend Theresa, who lives in WV and I don't get to talk to very often. She tells me that one of her best friends died on Monday and we talk for a while. Exhausted, but feeling quite unclean, I take a shower and then pass out at about 10:30 this morning. Two hours later, Ashley calls. Fifteen minutes later, I pass out again. Half an hour later, James calls. I decide to give up sleeping anymore. Time to start it all over again. ^_^;;;

I am currently on my laptop, Harold, typing out this entry. Does this mean that my beloved notebook is fixed? Sadly, no, but I finally figured out how to hook it up to another monitor and it's working fine. That means that the problem lies with the screen, which sucks on one hand in that it must be fixed, but is good in that it seems like all my data is safe. Still, I decided to spend the morning backing up my hard drive rather than sit in clinic just to be safe. After I'm done, Harold will be off to the techies and I probably won't see him for a while as he's being fixed. Hopefully he can be fixed and without any charge-but if it does cost something, I hope it's at least not much. Last night was fun. My friend Jason is back from his family trip to Colorado, so we went to see him last night, James and I. Ashley was already there, as she couldn't wait for a minute longer than she had to do to see him. ^_^;; We ended up going to Jason's favorite Mexican restaurant so he could have a beef tongue burrito (ew!) and then over to his friend Shaun's house. I guess Shaun's house is where he and Jason practice with their band, because we hung out in the garage surrounded by the One Night Stan drum kit and PA system. ^_^ We ended up hanging out over there with Shaun and his girlfriend, Chere, so long that we missed going to this open mic thing in Winterhaven that we originally planned on going to. Oh well, hehe. Then we went back to Jason's house for cheesecake and cartoons. Pretty nice way to end a night. By the way, I don't know if any of you are into podcasting, but Jason (Gote) will be on a podcast tonight for Q's House if any of you are interested. It's sad that we don't have Open Mic at the Coffee Connection anymore, but at least Gote has this to entertain his fans on Tuesday nights now. ^_^ Well, I've got a few more cds full of Harold's data finished, but a lot to go. Better focus on that if I want to be done by the time class starts in an hour and a half!

In the corners of my mind, there are gray places. In these industrial wastelands, the pavement is cracked and faded, and the alleys are narrow and bare. Thousands, millions, infinite numbers of pages, some of them blank, some of them almost black, most in between skitter and fly in the wind. These are dreams forgotten and lost memories-having no more significance than a particle of dust caught in a tornado. It seems to me that these lost dreams represent more than themselves. They are long made corporeal, they are hopes that tomorrow will not be just like today and that a person can the world. When I think about all these orphaned ideas, I feel like a neglectful mother. Here they rot in a bleak landscape, only remembered as a whole rather than an individual. I feel the wind on my face and in my hair and know that it represents the one force that is more like a speeding train than a river. Time engulfs me and sweeps away what was. The seconds are lost as quickly as they are felt, and never shall they return. As we grow older, our perception changes, and time seems to slip by faster, but this is merely illusion. We want to believe the time in which we live is worthy of remembrance, that some how people thousands of years from now will look back with envy, curiosity, fear, any passionate impression. There is always someone who believes that we are at the end of the world. Some day one of these people will be right. But for most, this is the raving hopes of a desperate soul. Please remember me. I'm significant! Of all the billion of people that were and the trillions of people to come, I am the most worthy of devotion. Love me. Hate me. Just don't close your eyes. Open yourself to me and let me in. I am all you ever dreamed. I am smarter, faster, more clever, more interesting... The surest way to be significant is to save lives. The surest way to do that is to selflessly follow the passions at the deepest recesses of your soul. You must sort through all those lost dreams and find The One. The One that will see you through all the obstacles that you will face. The One that will keep your fire burning through the wildest of storms. The One that can be described thusly: "A dream that will needAll the love you can giveEvery day of your lifeFor as long as you live"-Climb Every Mountain, from The Sound of Music. Never underestimate the wisdom gained from Julie Andrews movies. Heh.

My luck has just been terrible these last few days! It's very frustrating and annoying. I mean, check out this list:-Harold (my laptop) is still broken and I'm not sure if he can be fixed. -My desktop simply refuses to connect to the wireless network in the house and I can't figure out why or how to fix it.-I strained my back yesterday, so in addition to that being painful, there's the added complication that crawling around under my desk to try to fix my computers is difficult due to the pain. -I realized there is a mystery dent in the hood of my car that I didn't know what there until Wednesday, and I don't know where it came from. -My left knee is bothering me.-I had terrible insomnia last night and couldn't fall asleep until well after three and yet I had to get up at 6:15 to take James to work and went straight into the clinic afterward. Luckily:-I got to take a nap at clinic, so I'm not dead tired anymore.-I still have access to Lisa's computer to get my internet fix.-My car hood was already somewhat dented so it's not such a big deal to have another dent.-My back, which I strained yesterday, is already much improved. Still, it's been a strange few days since Wednesday. I hope the weekend's less annoying.