But this will be shortI have an old lady to look... 765
But this will be shortI have an old
lady to look afterShe's sleeping now, but I
don't like to leave her long
Pam, curious in spite of herself: "What old lady?"
"Her name's Elizabeth EastlakeShe's in her mideighties,
and she's got a good start on
Alzheimer'sHer principal caregiver is taking
care of an electrical problem with someone's sauna,
and I'm helping out
"Did you want a gold star to paste on the Helping
Others page of your workbook?"
"No, I called to convince you I'm not crazy I
had brought in my drawingNow I crooked the
378
handset between my shoulder and my ear so I could
pick it up
"Why do you care?"
"Because you're convinced that all this started
with Ilse, and it didn't
"My God, you're unbelievable! If she chanel top called from
Santa Fe and said she'd broken a shoelace, you'd
fly out there to take her a new one!"
"I also don't like you thinking that I'm down here
going insane when I'm notare you
listening?"
Only silence from the other end, but silence was
good enough
"You're ten or maybe fifteen minutes out of the
showerI think that because your hair is down on
the back of your housecoatI guess you still
don't like the hairdryer
"How-"
"I don't know howYou were sitting in a rocking
chair when I calledYou must have gotten it since
the divorceReading a book and eating a cookieA
Grandma's oatmeal cookieThe sun's out now, and
it's coming in the windowYou have a new
television, the kind with a flat screenIt's sleeping under the
TV
Dead second hand chanel silence from her endOn my end the wind blew
and the rain slapped the windowsI was about to
ask her if she was there when she spoke again, in
a dull voice that didn't sound like Pam at allI
had thought she was done hurting my heart, but I
was wrongIf you ever loved
me - stop spying on me
"Then stop blaming me," I said in a hoarse, notquite-
breaking voiceSuddenly I remembered Ilse
getting ready to go back to Brown, Ilse standing
in the strong tropical sun outside the Delta
terminal, looking up at me and saying, You deserve
to get betterSometimes I wonder if you really
believe that"What's happened to me isn't my
faultThe accident wasn't my fault and neither is
this
She screamed, "Do you think I did?"
I closed my eyes, gucci taske begging something, anything, to
keep me from giving back anger for anger
"Then leave me out of it! Stop calling me! Stop
SCARING me!"
380
She hung upI stood holding the phone to my ear
There was silence, then a loud clickIt was
followed by that distinctive Duma Key warbling hum
Today it sounded rather subaqueousMaybe because
of the rainI hung the phone up and stood looking
at the suit of armor"I think that went very well,
Sir Lancelot," I said
No reply, which was exactly what I deserved
x
I crossed the plant-lined main hall to the doorway
of the China Parlor, looked in at Elizabeth, and
saw she was sleeping in the same head-cocked
positionHer snores, which had earlier struck me
as pathetic in their naked antiquity, were white chanel watch ceramic now
actually comforting; otherwise, it would have been
too easy to imagine her sitting there dead with
her neck brokenI wondered if I should wake her,
and decided to let her sleepThen I glanced right,
toward the wide main staircase, and thought of her
saying Oh, you'll find it on the second floor
landing
Find what?
381
Probably it had been just another bit of gibberish,
but I had nothing better to do, so I walked down
the hall that would have been a dogtrot in a
humbler house - the rain tapping the glass ceiling
- and then climbed the wide staircaseI stopped
five risers from the top, staring, then slowly
climbed the rest of the wayThere was something,
after all: an enormous black-and-white photograph
in a frame of narrow banded chanel earrings
